Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Japablum Exclusive: Takeshi Kitano Announces His Top 5 Mammals of 2006


Celebrated comedian, filmmaker, and director Takeshi Kitano has just released his annual Top 5 Mammals list, and it is a strong reminder that 2006 was a great year for mammals across the land. So without further ado, heeeeeeeere's Takeshi!

#5. KITTENS IN COFFEE CUPS

Takeshi Kitano: I'm not usually a big fan of stuffing kittens into salad bowls or sock drawers or air conditioning vents to snap a cute picture of them, but these two look as if they were MEANT to be in those coffee cups. Look at them. It's as if they've just hatched from two gorgeous porcelain eggs, ready to rub their eyes, stretch their legs, and maybe kill a few squirrels and dump them on my ex-girlfriend's doorstep.

#4. BABY PANDAS

TK: Did you know that there is some debate among zoologists about whether pandas are bears, racoons, or their own unique species? I did not know that.

#3. EXISTENTIAL MONKEYS

TK: I'm really drawn to mammals that appear to have a really substantial interior life, like they're living their lives primarily inside their heads. This guy here, he reminds me of myself in such films as Brother, Hanabi, and Battle Royale. What's going on behind those pensive eyes?

#2. HAMSTERS!

TK: These little critters are key-yoot! Who wouldn't want one? Show me someone who doesn't want a fluffy little hamster. I'll shoot him dead.

#1. BEYONCE

TK: Hands down, the mammal of the year. Did you see Dreamgirls yet?

1 comment:

camdiggidy said...

thank you for existing.