"Listen, you people, I really have to put my foot down. Now, I love Hello Kitty as much as any other full-grown Japanese woman. I've got the Kitty stationery, and the crayon set and the underwear and the pie crust and the bowling ball and, of course, the shower nozzle. But what the f*ck is this? A tiny Hello Kitty piano, sure, I realize that. But how the hell am I supposed to play my Brahms on this thing? What's next? You going to make me eat my udon out of a Naruto thimble? Will I have to go to sleep on a Pokemon handkerchief and mop my floor with a toothpick and a DragonBallZ cotton swab? This is totally out of control. It's got to stop."
"Honestly, I can't even play 'Chopsticks' with chopsticks on this piece of crap."
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