Bai Ling, third-tier Hollywood actress and patron saint of underdressed Asian ho-bags the world over, was seen recently visiting a Tokyo temple praying that "the Lord, or Buddha, or God, or something" would "like, send me a text message with directions to the nearest Bahama Breeze.”
“I mean, listen, BuddhaJesus," Ling continued, "I just need a freakin’ mohito and a table top to stand on in an all-pastel setting! Can you please help?”
Ling, whose dead eyes have inhabited roles ranging from Peepshow Girl in Edmond to Punky Photographer in Lords of Dogtown to Mysterious Woman in Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow, was in Tokyo to promote her naval and undergarments and to be photographed.
No word yet on whether her prayer was answered.
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